I don't know whether to laugh or cry at the new ad on telly for Don Carlos olive oil. (Watch it here)
The arse on yer man - like two eggs fighting in a hanky. The camera lingers lovingly on the arse, snugly encased in grey flare flamenco trews as the man himself caresses a bottle of olive oil. Truly I have never seen such a sight in my life.
How on earth could an ordinary mortal get a bum like this? Here's some suggestions:
Advertised
- Many many many buttock clenches with hours per day doing other ass friendly exercises in the gym.
- A savage diet. Because you couldn't have a surplus ounce on you. Grey serge - so unforgiving darling.
- Severe detox to get rid of any wobble or surplus flab.
- Get yourself a bum facial
- A firming and toning body cream would be helpful certainly, but lets face it you can forget about your perfect bum dream if you've got a bad case of cellulite
- Obviously lots of olive oil
If you did all this you'd basically be a slave to your arse - never drinking coffee (cellulite alert), or eating anything nice, no crisps or chocolate of course. Alcohol - forget it. You'd never have time to do anything else because all your time would be spent exercising. The female version of Don Carlos is probably Madonna (who does live this miserable macrobiotic lifestyle).
But I think Don Carlos may possibly be getting a bit of help from man spanx to lift and separate...
