Fruit cake has long been the wedding cake of choice - you can freeze it for at least 987 years and it will still remain edible, you can keep costs down because no one is going to ask for a second piece of it and it's sturdy enough that you can pelt your cousins over the head with it if the wedding turns into faction fight.
And the office tells me that it was normal to sleep with a piece of it under your pillow post-your-Aunty's-wedding in the '80s so that you could dream of your future husband. This just adds to the gick-ness of the fruit cake.
It's clear that I'm not a fan of fruit cake.
Mind you, it's still better than the origins of wedding cake in Ancient Rome when a piece of bread was broken over the bride's head to bring good fortune to the couple. FOR THE LOVE OF VENUS, SEPTIMUS, MY HAIR.
But the new trend of wedding cake popping up all over Instagram is giving hope to cake-eating wedding attendees everywhere.
Baker Rachel Teufel of Intricate Icings Cake Design created the geode cake (geode referring to a crystal-filled spherical rock) using edible crystals and some serious skills.
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And the sugar-spun cake has been popping up all over Instagram since then.
Or you can mix it up with cupcake versions.
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Are you a fan of these non-traditional wedding cakes? Or are you Team Fruit Cake for life?
