X Factor questions and Dannii Minogue's short hair

Dannii looking pretty damn fabulous

It must be horrible being Dannii Minogue all the same. For starters you have to live your life in the shadow of Kylie. Who you can't possibly measure up to.  Then to make matters worse you are cast alongside Cheryl Cole in X Factor.  Who you can't possibly ever ever measure up to.

You just can't look lovelier than either of them - no matter how hard you try. So Dannii Minogue has decided to ditch the ultra girlie look of both her sister and her fellow judge and chopped her hair all off and gone short. She's taken the only route open to her - and is trying to look different.

"Rock Chick Dannii!" Heat exclaimed breathlessly. And Now concurred. Along with Reveal and Grazia and the rest of them. Grazia has delusions of grandeur you know. It's just as trashy as the other mags, but you know it fancies itself as being somehow above them.

Anyway other X Factor matters also press. So we have a clutch of questions to put to you, to wit:

1. Does Dannii's hair suit her?
2. Is Cheryl starting to look a little like a lollipop lady?
3. Why does Simon have that weird centre parting thing going on?
4. Does the new audition format (on the stage a la Britain's Got Talent) suck?
5. Don't you want to scream with rage every time Louis does that Leprechaun thing? He is shaming our entire nation.
6. Why is Simon being so nice?