Rate It: Best nail varnish topcoat

There are few things worse than spending aaaages painstakingly painting your talons only to watch the lovely varnish chip and flake off after what feels like no time at all. It's a feckin' nuisance and actually puts me off doing me nails sometimes; really, like, what is the point?!

Maybe it's just that I haven't yet found the perfect topcoat to protect my at-home manicures for days and days on end. Have you found the ultimate quick-drying, non-colour-dragging, high-shine, chip-repelling topcoat? Do tell! And what totally rubbish ones have you come across that we should all be avoiding like Le Plague?