My Sides: Spanx For Guys from Equmen

Touted, hilariously, as a 'core precision undergarment', I hooted as I read about Equmen's forthcoming body-enhancing underwear for men. It's not man-Spanx, people. Oh God no. In these matters, a spade can never be called a spade. Like Pepsi Max, sold as a manly drink for Sporty, Bungee-Jumpin' action dudes, little mention is made of its sugar-free (and therefore diet-tastic) status. Similarly,  Just For Men hair colour isn't a dye! Heaven forfend. No, it's just to enhance your natural, macho hair shade. And that's all it does. Ahem.

So, while there's obviously no way a man would buy one of these vests to slim his stomach and tone his abs - no no, this is for enhancement, ladies, not squishing down what God and doughnuts gave you - I have to say, it sounds really rather like putting on a pair of control pants: David Waters, of the Sunday Times, described the sweaty-faced experience of levering the garment on, and he also reckoned it slimmed his waist and helped him stand up straighter.

Conclusive proof, if ever there was any, that indeed, Equmen's body-enhancing vests and t-shirts are indeed, Man-Spanx.

Whisper it though, gals. Whisper it.