Lovely Girls:let's hear your judging criteria

When news reached us of the annual Tedfest on Craggy Island this year and the judging of Lovely Girls competitions we had to laugh uproariously. The finals tomorrow will consist of a homemade Swiss Roll heat, and presumably include who makes the best pot of tea and gets on best with potential Mammies-in-law.

The Aran Islands are expecting an onslaught as up to three hundred people will flock to the island to take part in the festival. Tractor pulling competitions and possible excursions to the Holy Stone will be optional.

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So, carrying on the tradition of taking the piss out of beauty competitions upheld so wittily by the Father Ted series, pretend for a minute that you're a judge. What other heats and trials would you include to ensure a worthy winner was picked?

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