It's the hottest week of the year (sun, please don't leave us) and no doubt you've been tempted to grab yourself an ice-cream and take in all the Vitamin D there's to be had. But before you do, you'd be best to have a read of this. We've gathered our information over many years and thousands of fallen 99s.
10. THE 99 (WITH OPTIONAL FLAKE)
Perhaps consigned to the history books, the Ice-Cream Van and its fabled 99's with sprinkles, raspberry topping and sprinkles were the cornerstones of our summers. You can get them in normal shops now, but it's not the same anymore. It has to be near a large body of water, and you've got to have Factor 50 on.
9. THE CORNETTO
A cultural institution, much like the previous entry, it's been in service for almost twenty years. Strawberry's our weapon of choice. Don't be coming in here with that mint crap. Oh no.
8. THE SUPER MARIO ICE-CREAM
It had strawberry, vanilla and chocolate ice-cream, it was made into the face of your favourite Italian plumber, and it was about 30p. This thing defined our childhood.
7. THE FAT FROG
It might be connected to an alcoholic drink for teenagers on their Leaving Cert. night, but there was a time when Fat Frogs were actually enjoyable. Zingy lime and under 20p, you couldn't go wrong.
6. THE TANGLE TWISTER / THE TONGUE TWISTER
If you mention Tongue Twister, you're definitely showing your age. Nobody remembers those. No, we all have fond memories of the Tangle Twister. Suck hard enough and you got to the reddish centre. DON'T RUIN IT, IT'S JUST ICE CREAM.
5. MARS ICE-CREAM BAR
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These things are disgustingly addictive. We're convinced the caramel is made up of some unknown narcotic that drives people to eat five of them. Be mindful of the falling chocolate, though. We've ruined many a grand pair of trousers devouring these.
"Yes, I'll take twenty." - But they'll melt before you can eat them all? - "Challenge accepted."
4. MR. FREEZE COOL POPS
It's been a few years now so we can ask this - what exactly was the flavour of the Blue one? We knew the brownish one was Cola; the red one was Strawberry obviously, and the purple one was Blackcurrant - but what about the blue one? Answers on a postcard, please.
"You wanna know how I got these scars?"
3. HAAGEN-DAZS
Probably the greatest symbol that we'd gotten WAY ahead of ourselves during the Celtic Tiger era was that we had Haagen-Dazs shops. That's right. You could sit down in a shop, IN IRELAND, and eat Haagen-Dazs ice-cream. Truly the greatest excess of the Celtic Tiger.
Bradley Cooper just carries this around with him in case anyone needs a fix.
2. THE MAGNUM
Luxurious, that crack they make when you bite into them, and the fact that they were absolutely huge - Magnums were amazing. The pinnacle of ice-cream technology. A rich man's Choc Ice.
1. BEN & JERRY'S
Phish Food. Baked Alaska. Strawberry Cheesecake. Peanut Butter Jam Session. Caramel hat-trick. Your mouth's watering right now, isn't it?
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