No football rules for Des, you hear
Fifty Fine Things doesn’t have much small print. It only has a couple of entry conditions really. One of these is that candidates must have a langer (this is an unspoken but we think largely understood rule) and the second is that they must be Irish. (Read the entry conditions here)
Fair enough? Well not really apparently because one of our conditions states:
- No ‘football rules’ votes here, so that means Des Bishop, Dermot O’Leary, Aidan Quinn and That Sorta Kinda Irish Fella are not eligible
But … we had heard rumours that he of the great body and side splitting turn of phrase was not happy about this.
And so came to pass yesterday’s exchange.
The Bishop didn’t deign to answer – except to call us xenophobic. Check out this tweet in all its passive aggressive fineness.
We told him we loved him. He replied:
@beautie I know you do. In that cute xenophopic way xx
Now hang on a minute here. As you ARE a native New Yorker Mr Bishop (that’s what you call yourself on your own website, with no mention of being Irish) and much of your comedy revolves around parodying the Irish from an outsiders perspective, you can understand why we were puzzled. You didn’t move here from Queens til you were in your mid teens and in our book that makes you American.
However we can see that you’ve made a huge effort to become more Irish then the Irish themselves and from the looks of things probably speak the language better than most of us too. We hope Citizen Des will accept our apology and take his place as an undisputed and thoroughly Irish Fine Thing: to that end we have amended the hallowed Rules and now alongside the Fassbender Clause is a new Bishop Clause.
Rules they is made to be broken. It’s probably too late now for Des to get a decent showing this year but next year we will strew petals on the pathway in order to entice him up the list.
So the question remains. Would you have voted for Des before rule change? If so leave a comment and we’ll count it as a vote!
Now we just hope Dermot O’Leary doesn’t want to lay down a challenge…
P.S. voting closes tonight at midnight- if you haven’t voted do it now!