Are You a Helper Monkey?

By | June 12 2009 | 32 Comments

Monkey Grooming

Confession time:

I can’t help it - if I see a blackhead on Himself, I am just ITCHING to squeeze it out. I must emphasise that I do not feel the need to hoke excess sebum out of people not very close to me, but if I spy an ‘area of congestion‘ that’s ripe for poking, well then, I’ll hoke, permission granted or not.

This led to me being crossly dubbed ‘helper monkey’, so I was wondering, am I the only helper monkey on Or will some more of you ‘fess up and join the club?

Problem skin, Skin, WTF , , ,

32 Replies to "Are You a Helper Monkey?"

  • Keila says:

    My mum loves doing that to my dad, ick! I don’t mind hoking my own but have never had an urge to do same for an other half.

  • lemon verbena says:

    I cannot STAND when people do this!!

  • Renee says:

    I’m guilty of this!! My bf will laugh when he hears about this post… I don’t know how it got started b/c I never did this to previous boyfriends.

  • MontyC says:



  • Kirstie says:

    heh heh heh! I’m just a skincare helper, look at it that way!

  • Can't remember previous name says:

    Yes, I do this. Eyebrows that look like they need a tidy, or anything fun to poke at. Only on himself though. I think it dates back to a love of picking at my brother’s cradle cap when I was a child and he was a baby. my mother had to keep a close eye on me at all times.
    It is my guilty pleasure.

  • Sparkle101 says:

    Yep – his neck just looks so much better when they’re not there. I’m doing it for the people to have to stand beside him on the train and stare at the ickiness.

  • Kirstie says:

    exactly. it’s a public service!

  • Buttons says:

    I have to confess too… I’m always checking to see if he’s got any on his back, gross I know. But worse if I have to see them still there and know he’ll never be able to get them out himself!

  • mindymarillo says:

    Gross oh i just couldnt. boyf gets one on his back that his mum (!!!!!) always pokes at, i would faint if i even tried!!! the only helping i ve ever done was prising sea anemone spikes out of his feet with a needle but that required many “dont faint you can do this” breaks. shudder.

  • roxette says:

    Im guilty too :oops: himself gets fierce annoyed though when i start pickin at him.
    he does let me do his eyebrows though because they have a life of their own – and if left untreated he would end up like Teen Wolf

  • RedAlert says:


  • tiana says:

    I’m so guilty of this!!!! I just can’t help myself and my boyfriend calls me a ‘picker’. But as you said Kristie this is a public service – he thinks that if he exfoliates enough they will go ..i don’t think so ;)

  • rosey says:

    Guilty as charged! Though I normally end up screaming when the gunk pops out…

  • lemon verbena says:

    ah jesus yiz are sick I tells ya

  • ladyelvis says:

    Ewwww this is me the shame-he gives out yards when I squeeze too hard! So I got the Biore nose strips-also disgustingly satisfying!

  • loulou lashes says:

    I must confess that i do this too…only to the boyfriend tho, any blackheads on his back i just have to squeeze…..Gross i know!! & pluck his eyebrows he’d have a monobrow otherwise lol!

  • Becky Clark says:

    Guilty, love it. He hates it but when I tell him that its most likely ingrown hairs and that it will cause a terrible boil if left untended he lets me at em. Sucker!

  • Selina says:

    Oh I am so guilty of this, I get such a thrill out of it and I’m famous for it too! I had a teenage friend visiting once and in the middle of squeezing her pimples the phone rang. Friend on the other end asked what I was doing, I replied I was squeezing teenage girl’s pimples and he exclaimed “Ooh, just what you’ve always wanted, a teenager!”.

  • Glitterkitty says:

    oh my mom does this to dad all the time!!
    blackheads or ‘wee pimply things’
    she’s a complete picker..

    i would be too but just on myself

    dad had to get a strange couple of ‘lump’ things checked out at hospital
    like flattened blisters that weren’t sore, kind yellow-y in colour, one on his cheek, one on his head?

    the doctor was v cautious when he saw them first, was v afraid that a biopsy would bleed like mad, esp if there was ‘a root’ attached

    my cousin was on duty that day and was able to tell the doctor
    ‘oh, it won’t bleed, there’s no root – my aunt picked them off a few weeks ago the first time they appeared and there was no blood, no root’

    eeeuuuwwww… gross story but it was medically satisfying to know that

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